Monday, October 5, 2015

Lessons from His Calendar

I should have known better.  Didn't my mom try to teach me not to ask why...just do as I'm told?  I guess sometimes it takes awhile to learn some lessons.  That lesson, and the one about God not needing my help in planning my life.
When I met Dr. Wiegand in July, one of the first things I told him was that I wanted to have my kidney surgery right away, because I had a new grandbaby due in October, and I wanted to be well enough to go up and be there for the birth.  He understood, and took that into consideration.
Because of the intense pain I'd been having, he ordered a nephrostomy tube to be placed through my back, into my kidney.  It was held in place by a single stitch.  This was to let my kidney rest, until the surgery could take place.   Despite the use of "happy juice", when they put the tube in, I'm not going to lie...it hurt.  A lot.  The pain afterward was pretty bad for about 10 days.  Then the tummy pain subsided, but I had another nagging pain.  I had to be very careful how I moved, because if the tube moved a certain way it felt like I was getting stabbed.  As a result, I've been pretty much homebound ever since.
At every doctor visit, I would remind him of the upcoming birth...and he would order another test.
"Really?" I would think after every postponement of the surgery.  The time was clicking away!  I had to get this done and over with!!   I knew the doctor knew what he was doing, but the birth date was getting closer and closer!
He ordered another test for the 9th of Sept. I thought that there was still a chance to travel, if he did the surgery right afterward.  I would be recuperating, but I'd tough it out.  I saw him after the procedure, and he gave me the news that I needed one more final test.  I just lost it.  I cried, knowing that going up for the birth was out of the question.  The doctor patted my hand and said, "Don't you want to be around for your grandchildren, without having to do dialysis?"  I knew he was right, but still was heartbroken.
Two days later Shannon told me that she had to have a C Section and that the baby was going to be born early. We found out later that it was scheduled for the 2nd of October.  My test was for the 30th of Sept.  Maybe this was the answer!  All this time, we thought the surgery was supposed to be first, but it was the birth!   Only one little issue...sitting for that long, with that painful tube.  But I thought, "I don't care, I'll ignore it!  I'm GOING!"
The thirtieth comes around and they're prepping me for the test.  They casually say, "Oh, your tube has been in since July?  They'll go ahead and replace it while they're doing the test."  I was dumbfounded.  The only thing I could think of was all of that pain that I'd had when they inserted it.  ANOTHER one?  NO!!!!  I had to ride for hours in a car the next day!!!  I tried to reason with them, but they insisted that it had to be replaced because of potential infection. 
I was so upset, thinking of all of the "what ifs".  Then I caught myself and tried to calm down and quietly had a "conversation" with God.
"Really?  I know You know better, but a new tube?  This is not good!!  I'm giving the situation to You, but I don't  want to.  I know You know what I have to do tomorrow, so I'm going to trust You!"
But I was still upset.
They asked me if I wanted sedation, and I told them no.  I had to see the surgeon afterward, and I didn't want to hang around longer than I  had to.  Did you know that I was stubborn?
The doctor began to remove the tube and I felt him clip that stitch.  Something felt funny.  They then replaced the tube.  IT DIDN'T HURT AT ALL!!!!!  The doctor said that he was going to do a different kind of thing and not put another stitch in.  I then had to roll over on my back for the test.  I was amazed...no pain.  After the test I was moving all around...no pain!  I then knew why I had to have the tube replaced.  So that I could travel comfortably! I could sit and stand without that stitch stabbing me!
I can just picture God shaking His Head at me when I was having that "conversation" with Him.  He was probably wanting to say, "Yada, yada, yada...Will you just be quiet and let Me do this?!!!"
As we were driving up to Pensacola, I got a phone call from the hospital.  My surgery date was scheduled.  All of that needless worry and concern...for nothing.  God had it on His Calendar the whole time.  He knew, when I didn't know, that all would be ok.
And this?  
THIS for all of the delays.  So that I could be there for the birth of this beautiful little miracle. God is my loving Father that wants to bless me with things that I desire.
So am I nervous about the surgery?  No, I can honestly say I'm not.  I am concerned, of course, but not worried.  God has this, just like He always does.  He is forever faithful.

1 Thessalonians 5:24 (ESV) He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it.                

5 comments:

  1. As always, you have me in tears. Your writing is so eloquent and your words are from your heart. Thank you for reminding me of letting Him plan my journey for He knows what tomorrow holds. Happy for your family as y'all enjoy your newest member and praying for your surgery to be a success and as painless as it can possibly be!

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    1. It's a day to day (and sometimes moment to moment) surrender isn't it?! Thanks so much for your encouragement and prayers, Mary Gale! :)
      Peggy

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  2. What a beautiful, God honoring story, Peggy! Praising the Lord and celebrating with you in my heart, and so happy for you! Love you friend! ♡tina

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    1. Thank you so much! I appreciate your kind words! God is so good!! :)
      Peggy

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